Merry Christmas! I invite you to reflect with me on two of my favorite Christmas verses.

Therefore he had to become like his brothers and sisters in every respect, so that he might be a merciful and faithful high priest in the service of God, to make a sacrifice of atonement for the sins of the people. Because he himself was tested by what he suffered, he is able to help those who are being tested.” (Hebrew 2:17–18)

For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who in every respect has been tested as we are, yet without sin. Let us therefore approach the throne of grace with boldness, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.” (Hebrews 4:15–16)

Suffering comes to everyone in a unique way. How much we suffer and are tested depends on the contrast between what we are accustomed to and what we are experiencing.

Take a moment and try to grasp what “normal” is like for Jesus. Consider the scale of creation and recall that all things came into being through him. Spend some time. Soak it in. It’s Christmas after all, what’s your hurry?

Now consider that Jesus Christ emptied himself of all of that (his divinity). How else could he truly suffer, be sincerely tempted, experience dependence on the Spirit, and learn through obedience the joy of faith transformed into reality? “…like his brothers and sisters in every respect… tested as we are.” He bled, got sick, felt powerful anger, horrible want, crushing disappointment, and profound sadness. “Born in a manger” does not even begin to capture what Jesus went through.

Christmas leads inevitably to Easter and the astounding gift of salvation. However, we do not need to wait to open the gift of God’s radical humility. Today, wrapped in the pain of human existence and failure, we can boldly approach the throne expecting only inexhaustible grace from a God who shares our suffering, understands our weakness, and cries our tears. Merry Christmas!

I am going to be honest here with you. Being a Dad is the most difficult thing I have ever done, but being a Dad with solid Christian values has reshaped the way I see the world. I look at my daughters as princesses and my sons as princes. I have entirely different expectations for my children’s future than that of those who do not believe in the Lord.

I fully intend to raise my children up fully immersed in the name of Jesus Christ. That not only means raising them up to be good people. It means to raise them up to be followers of Jesus. I don’t want my kids to be cast to the waves of this world. I want them to cling to the rock that is Jesus Christ. I want them to know that Jesus is the reason why they exist and continue to draw breath.

It is my hope that they will indeed cling to Jesus especially in those hard times and times of temptation. For my sons, it is my hope that they would cling to the image of Jesus and not the images this world has to offer. For my daughters, it is also my hope that they wouldn’t cling to the images of this world. I hope that my sons wouldn’t seek out images of women that don’t represent reality; same goes for my daughters. I don’t want my sons to seek in order to lust, and I don’t want my daughters to seek in order to emulate.

I want my sons to work and to watch for Jesus. I want my daughters to seek Jesus. It is my goal to raise my children to love but to also be wise in Jesus, not in this world. Don’t get me wrong I love this world, but I love Jesus much, much more. We need to stop with the porn, irresponsibility, ignorance, selfishness, wickedness, divorce, drunkenness, and gluttony. Like I said, I am going to be honest: we need more of Jesus. So that’s my plan to raise my children to be more like Jesus.

photo credit: Paulgi via photopin cc

Friendship has been defined as a relationship which consists of mutual respect and admiration bound up in trust.

Finding this in this society could be just as easy as walking out in your yard and digging up a 5 carat diamond.

Some of our days seem like the best companion we could ever meet is loneliness.

And then there are those days that that one person says the right thing and empowers you to keep on pushing through the storm.

It takes time to learn how to deal with people and their little quirks. So we tend to seek solitude and lean inward in all group discussions and house parties; we become accustomed to being alone in a crowd of people. They seem strange because we see them as too adventurous and joyful. They are similar to those shrubs and little trees which pop up in the corners of backyards and are trimmed out of existence. They offer change which was not desired nor requested.

Friendship has to be the association of people who care for one another so deeply that they are not afraid to speak the truth to you and the mere thought of betraying them hurts you so much you refuse to cross that line.

I can tell you that for the longest time in my life, I was hugged up with distrust for those who were not like me. If they did not come from the same area or had not experienced similar failures in life; I did not want a thing to do with them. But there comes a time in all our days that we have to accept the calling of maturation and wisdom. My choice came three years ago. I am all the better for it.

Not to drudge up a story requiring three violins softly playing in the background, I don’t feel like the odd man out any longer when I am being engaged in this group of men. Trust for a man is a hard thing to develop. It becomes difficult when it has to be sustained at a high level.

Friendship has been defined as a fellowship of associates willing to give their last to keep the other alive and well.

Maintaining a strong level of trust requires each party willing to take on all criticism and then change after being hurt. This is called growing up. This is called becoming an adult.

As a boy, we are taught to become “Kings of the Hill” and then later in life, we want to become “Kings of our Castles.” The entire time we alienate those we are supposed to love because we are on a direct mission to conquer those people and things we desire to have as possessions. In the middle of all of this, somehow Christ stuck His Hands in the lives of the four guys you see in this blog and created a fellowship that is still growing and still using the members to teach each other and test the boundaries of love and hate.  Yes, I said love. We have gotten off of the macho horse and seek each other out to make sure each is still holding on and willing to love the people in their homes, not as possessions, but as the gifts God has blessed us with.

This is the catalyst that is cementing our friendships.

I think we are on equal ground.

That is just strange.

Normally when there are a group of friends, one is chosen the leader and the others follow. But in this group we all seek to push one another toward the example of Jesus and then squint to see if those same qualities are being developed in our personal walks.

It is evident that growth has taken place in this group. We bounce our daily decisions off of one another, fully expecting to be slammed if the quest doesn’t make sense or will not be profitable for the family in question.

Friendship has been defined as having unlimited bounds that each party accepts and is willing to move toward to keep the unit strong and viable.

I am no longer alone in a crowd of people.

I am amongst friends.

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Being a Christian is hard. No, I don't mean because we're persecuted. What do Americans know about persecution? Even as Christians we're at the top of the food chain. What I mean is, following our faith is hard.

See, even Christians still struggle to figure out their lives. Whenever you hear someone says, "God just won't answer me," they really do feel like God has abandoned them. Whenever you hear a person saying, "I don't know what I'm supposed to do with my life," they really mean they aren't sure where the best fit in.

I'm one of those people.

I was catching up with a professor from undergrad a couple weeks back, asking questions about getting some more schooling. The questions I was asking were attempting to figure out if that's what I should be doing with my life, and what the next step would be from there. It's funny when I talk to people about that. Generally, people give me that blank stare which means, "How should I know what you should do with your life? I don't even know what I'm doing with mine!"

This professor friend of mine surprised me. He said to me, "I believe that God gives some people specific tasks, and they should be following them. For others, He points them to the Torah and says to follow it."

This was one of the more profound things I've ever heard.

It turns out, I'm not one of those people who God gave a specific task. I'm not Steve Jobs, out to change the computing world. I'm not Barak Obama, leading the most powerful and influential country in the world. I have not been given a task as profound and deep as that.

At first, I was depressed. Why wouldn't God choose me to do something great? It's amazing that our first reactions always seem to be the negative ones, huh? As I pondered what my professor friend said, I realized how freeing it was. To people like Jobs and Obama, specifics tasks are given and greatness tends to follow, but they walk a very fine line. For them, doing right means leading God's children to a better future; screwing up, well, we all know what history does to people like Hitler.

For the rest of us, our only "task," then, is to follow the Torah. What we do with the rest of our lives, well, is up to us. Essentially, I weigh my hopes and dreams agains the skills that I have, and pick a path that will best suit my joys and help the most people. It seems scary because I still don't quite know what that path will be. Yet, it's freeing because I now know that whatever mistakes I make will not affect the Kingdom too badly; God hadn't placed that burden on me.

Sometimes, Being a Christian is hard. It means following God wherever He decides to take you.

Other times, being a Christian isn't so bad. I get to find the best way of expressing who I am in the Kingdom. That's not so hard. In fact, all I have to do is, well, be me.

photo credit: Fr. Stephen, MSC via photopin cc

When I was growing up in Moscow, Idaho in the early seventies I wanted to play Little League baseball. So, my dad took me to the hardware store and let me pick out a bat from their small circular display. I choose a huge, blue, wooden beauty of a bat. It was way too big for me. I could barely lift it let alone swing it effectively. I have no idea why my normally wonderful and responsible father let me pick that one.

We played in our blue jeans and t-shirts.

I don’t remember a single thing my coach ever said to me.

I never got a hit.

But, I played baseball, and it was incredibly important to me.

This was back when I believed in God the first time. I had learned again and again that if I prayed and believed hard enough God would give me what I asked for. “You can ask for anything in my name, and I will do it, so that the Son can bring glory to the Father. Yes, ask me for anything in my name, and I will do it!” (John 14:13, 14). Challenge accepted!

I prayed hard for us to beat the best team in our Little League, the widely hated Yankees. I prayed powerfully like only a foolish little kid who believes in a very literal translation of the bible can pray. I prayed and believed and prayed and told my friends that we we’re going to beat the Yankees.

…

After I recovered my faith a couple of months later, I prayed for something much simpler. I prayed that God would help me catch bugs and put them in the tent I had erected in our big front yard. I prayed and believed. Hard. Again, this was very important to me. Although, I must admit there was a bit of an edge to my faith, kind of a one eye slightly open, heart not wanting to get hurt again, believing but maybe not really able to believe all the way anymore kind of edge.

I didn’t catch any bugs, at least not any decent bugs. I was crushed.

I did what any rational person would do. I walked away and pouted…for about thirty years.

God let me pout. God let me do a lot of really ridiculous things, but eventually one of us decided I’d had enough. I started learning about praying and trusting all over again, but I never forgot about baseball and bugs.

I spent four years begging God to let me go to seminary (or God spent that time convincing me I could.). Two years later, after I had prayed, believed, and trusted my family, finances, and fitness to God I had ballooned up to 290 pounds (see “Should I be Mad at God for Letting Me Get Fat?). It was baseball and bugs all over again.

Me and God, we had it out, several times. I cussed, yelled, doubted, threatened, and pouted, the whole nine yards. God just chuckled patiently and invited me to a deeper faith that involved my active participation in his providence and my sanctification. Despite the fact that I had absolutely no time available after addressing family, full-time work, ministry, and full-time grad school I had to menu plan, shop, cook, and work out.

So, I choose a goal (this was about four months ago). I wanted to be able to jump up and casually run over to wherever I wanted to go. No big deal. I don’t need to look like Vin Diesel or play running back for the Ducks. I just want to be able to hustle. I want free and easy mobility.

Now that God and I are working together, things are going pretty well. I’ve dropped a ton of weight. But, you know what? My goal has been ripped away from me. My right knee is killing me. It used to come and go, but now it just hurts all the time. I can still walk, ride my bike, work out, and do all the things I need to do to get in shape. But, I can’t run or jump. Getting up is a chore. It takes time and it hurts.

What is going on with our wacky, all powerful, purely loving God? First, I thought it was pick a goal, pray, trust, and get blessed…Nope! Then I thought it was pick a goal, pray, trust, work with God, and get blessed…Yes, I’m far thinner, and that is wonderful, but no. Moving hurts and I’m less able to hustle then I was at 290.

So…finally…here is my point. Gratitude is hard. It requires flexibility.

This is not one of those weepy blog posts about how wonderful God and Christianity are if you’ll just “let go and let God.” It’s a heads up. Following Christ isn’t easy. Prayer and trust are not sufficient. You need to get in the game, and when you do you may not get to pick your own goals. You have to work consistently and despite pain to choose gratitude over bitterness.

Consider praying for awareness of the blessings God has already given you. Embrace the mercy we all float in rather than demanding justice. Accept God’s invitation to develop an understanding of faith as belief in the unseen, as hope and love without proof, and find astounding peace and joy exactly where you are right now.

Today, we are proud to bring you a joint venture: Odd Man Out. We are currently working towards our Masters of Divinity at George Fox Evangelical Seminary. Out of the midst of our lives from around the country, God has brought us all together in one place to strengthen, support, and guide each other through and in a passionate relationship with Christ.

We launched this blog to bring some of that support directly to you. We believe some of the greatest ways to find passion and support is hearing the stories and insights gathered from others. The four of us come from different walks of life and different places in the country; not two of us live in the same state! Yet we have managed to take us from one level in our spiritual journeys to an even greater and deeper level. Our hope is that through our blog, we will help guide you.

Let us be honest with you a moment: none of our insights come from powerful intellectual moments; instead, they are a result of something we experienced in our lives that caused us to stumble. Through propping each other up, we have managed to take those trips, stumbles, and even falls, turning them into something which strengthens our relationships with our families, each other, and—most especially—the God we love and cherish. Likely, our stories and blurbs will be something similar to what you've experienced, or perhaps are experiencing already. Our hope is that you may genuinely take away from our lives a small nugget which guides you towards the piece of mind for which you are looking.

May God bless you, guide you, and keep you safe.

Dan, Kevin, Mat, and Matt